Tuesday, February 21, 2023

Birds at Large: The Birds of Elden Ring


I know I'm about a year late on this but who cares. Elden Ring is a video game, and it rules. It's the latest in a series of games from a company called FromSoftware where the player travels some forsaken countryside killing monsters and knights and ghouls and all kinds of other what-have-yous. It's the first game in the series that I've ever played, but I've been obsessed with it for the past bunch of months.

Not everything in the Elden Ring universe is, like, a murderous skeleton or a blood-spewing demigod. There's also wildlife! They're just hanging around and living their little lives in the middle of an insane world of death and despair. There are deer and sheep and bears and pigs. And birds. Let's talk about the birds.

Eagle

The first bird you encounter in Elden Ring are these eagle-looking birds, just hanging out on cliff edges. They're vaguely Golden Eagle-looking, though aren't exactly that. They make a sort of chirping noise that I can't really place, and they fly when you get close. Maybe the most numerous bird in the game. 


Warhawks

The cliffside eagles aren't hostile, but there are some other eagle-type birds that do come after you and they're a real pain in the ass. Warhawks have blades attached to their legs (some of them also have falconry hoods), and they're massively annoying when they come attack you. Players just getting started through Stormveil Castle know what I'm talking about, but they're not any easier later in the game, like a nasty gauntlet of them in Crumbling Farum Azula, which you have to run through while also dodging a lightning-casting dragon. Ugh. 


Here I am about to get chonked in the back by this jerk in Stormveil Castle. 




Guillemot

These alcids are fairly common on the oceanside cliffs and beaches in the southern part of the map. Fitting with the UK bent of the wildlife in this game, this bird is what we in the states would call a Common Murre (EDIT: or, perhaps more likely, a Thick-billed Murre). The Guillemots in the game call when you're close to them, but it doesn't sound like the sound of real Common Murres, not sure what it is.


Here I am sneaking up on some of these MFers on a beach. So confiding! Maybe they're sick, from all the death. 




Owl

The least common of the cliffside birds, in my playing experience, is this owl. It's clearly a Northern Hawk Owl, but it sits on cliffs rather than on the tops of trees like real hawk owls. The Elden Ring owls make a soft hooting noise instead of the undulating sounds of a hawk owl. A missed opportunity if you ask me. 


A Bunch of Birds That Swirl Around 

If you climb up near the top of Mt. Gelmir, real close to where you have to fight that big rock bull guy, there are all these birds flying around. They sound like crows, but they're barely rendered and look more like swallows or something. I dunno. They're birds. 

Here's my dude climbing up the ladder and you can see some of the birds in the background. This isn't a funny post or anything these are literally just the birds from this video game.

Oh god no those Giant Crows

Some of the game's scariest and toughest non-boss enemies are these nightmares found around Caelid and Mohgwyn Palace. The Mohgwyn ones are covered in disgusting bloody sores, for good measure. I hate these shits and never want to see them again.



Deathbirds

There are four of these "field bosses" that appear at night in certain areas of the map. They're birds, I guess, in that they have "bird" in their name and they have, like, the skull of a giant baby owl. But they also have wings and arms, and are just generally not very birdlike. They're skeletons for chrissakes. Plus each and every one of them kicked my ass multiple times before I could find the right cliff to stand on to smoke them with arrows from a mile away.


Thanks that's all! Great to see you all!



2 comments:

Anonymous said...

From someone who has never touched a video game, this was a surprisingly fun read. Write it like you see it dude!

Anonymous said...

There's also cuckoo birds caged within the Academy of Raya Licaria. One can be found in a big cage in the room with the church of the cuckoo site of Grace

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